I will marry when I want

Our first date was unforgettable. I dressed to impress in a sharp pin-striped shirt and black trousers, hoping to make a good impression. To my surprise, she later confessed that I seemed taller than usual. 

We’d spent hours the night before chatting on the phone, lost in a world of our own. It was one of those conversations you never wanted to end. As the sun rose, we couldn’t wait to pick up where we left off.

I’d prepared a  home made picnic lunch (my young economy could not support paying for a restaurant on every meeting), complete with sandwiches, which she devoured with gusto that almost made me change my mind about her. No wonder I still believe that you need to eat at before you leave home. I however reasoned that “If she ate that much, then she must love food, and so we will never starve but always have a fest. I was right. 

”But the real feast was our conversation. We shared our wildest dreams, from building a home together to starting a family and creating a business empire. We even discussed our plans for our extended families.

As a token of my affection, I picked her a flower, a gesture that became a tradition on our subsequent dates. As I handed it to her, I couldn’t help but say, “Just like this flower blooms, our lives can blossom if we trust in the power of God.”
 

Except the Lord build a house they labour in vain that build it; except the Lord keep the city, the watchman wakes but in vain. Psalm 127:1

No amount of calling or ringing can wake up a person unless the Lord himself has given life. No amount of dating, courting or reading self-help books can give you enough preparation for marriage or assurance of a successful marriage unless you have learnt the art of surrender of your will to God, seeking Him that He may build you a marriage.  However, the following principles can lay courtship foundations for success for marriage

Building a lasting relationship can feel like a daunting task, similar to the ambitious construction of the Tower of Babel.While modern engineering marvels like the Burj Khalifa are impressive, they pale in comparison to the ancient dream of reaching the heavens.

Many couples approach marriage with the sole goal of impressing others, focusing on extravagant weddings and social status. However, building a relationship without a strong foundation in faith is a recipe for disaster. Just as the Tower of Babel collapsed, any relationship built on human pride and ambition will eventually crumble.

Back to Eden

So, is a perfect relationship simply a matter of luck or divine intervention? The answer lies in understanding God’s principles for building a strong and enduring bond. Let’s look back at the Garden of Eden, where the first family was created, and discover the blueprint for a successful relationship.

Principle 1: God made the ideal environment

Following God’s blueprint for creation, we witness a transformation from a chaotic, undefined state to a world of order and purpose. God brings structure, inspiration, and meaning to a world without form, boundary, .

God names , defines and separates his creature making each to serve a purpose.

Similarly, young people seeking clarity in their lives must embrace God’s principles of order and boundaries. A thriving marriage requires a clear sense of self, defined by one’s relationship with God. Avoid the temptation to compromise your identity to impress others. Instead, seek guidance from the Holy Spirit and actively work to eliminate distractions and confusion, creating a fertile ground for a fulfilling relationship.

An ideal youthful life and practice is  the ideal environment for marriage. Bring creativity to your life. Start and complete tasks. Keep your word and look to God who will perfect the work he has began in you. 1. Let God MAKE  you

Principle 2: Man was commanded to be (Become) fruitful

Adam was commanded to become something. God said, “Be fruitful.” This was not merely a directive to acquire, but a statement of what he needed to become first. Many people long for possessions, wealth, property, and even marriage, but they often neglect the most important aspect: personal growth.

Marriage can ruthlessly expose internal voids and insecurities. Youth offers a unique opportunity for personal development. As you age, strive to gain wisdom and maturity. Unfortunately, some reach old age empty-handed, lacking both wisdom and maturity. The person you become is the person you will attract as a partner, and your character will determine the quality of your marriage. Strive to be diligent, kind, trustworthy, reliable, self-reliant, and faithful. Become the best version of yourself.         So Number 2.  BECOME more

So the second point is 2. Become the best you can

Principle 3: Man was then to multiply  (DO ) and replenish the earth 

After becoming who they were meant to be, man and woman were now capable of doing what God intended. Our ability to perform well stems from our personal growth. We accomplish more because we have become more. It’s a grave error to attempt actions we are not prepared for. This is why the marriage vow includes the phrase “I do.”

As young people approach marriage, they should familiarize themselves with responsibility. To achieve more, they must be willing to do more and expect more. Marriage thrives on service and dedication. Those who have not developed a strong work ethic will be unprepared for the challenges and responsibilities of married life. Third, is DO all you can

Principle 4: God saw that it was not good for the man to be alone

 After God has made for man a perfect environment, God makes the man, then God makes the man to do. Now here man is in full production.  The command was to be fruitful., that is to be productive. Soon God sees that man is not to selfishly produce for himself and He makes a help meet. Evidently now this is a mouthful and we  must wait for the next post to  conclude this thought. It is not good to be alone.

Andrew Okwany is an Engineer, Educator and speaker.